B55
My stress level = 100 stress units. Bearable stress level = 1 stress unit.
I need a break. I feel like running away somewhere for some time. The problem is that there’s too many conferences, workshops, and schools in the next two months that I have to attend. All this while trying to make progress in my project.
It’s too much.
Update May 24 21:52:
Stress level at 10 am: 10
At 11 am: 150
At 1 pm: 100
At 3 pm: 100
At 4 pm:
Okay, let’s make it simple. There are only 4 levels to stress: 0, 1, 2, and 3. Level 0 is a chilled out person who’s life is blooming like a flower. No stress. Level 1 is normal daily life stress: out of milk, late for work, flat tyre when you have to go to an important meeting, normal things. Level 2 is when this normal daily life stress continues for weeks and it starts to disorient us: occassional bad behaviour, tiredness, exhaustion, minor sleep disorder. The things that can be fixed or controlled by taking some days off. Then we have level 3. That’s when we break down. Behavioural issues for extended period. Sleep disorder. Racing mind. Always exhausted. This level requires external intervention. Someone has to assess the situation for us because we can’t make sense of it completely. Someone has to be there for us, professionally or personally.
Now with this scale set up, I can say that I have been oscillating between level 2 and 3 for the past two months, at least. I am talking about the situation at work. Yesterday I was at Level 3. This morning I was at level 2. When I went to the uni I was at level 1. By noon I was at level 2 to 3 again. After that I was at level 2 for the rest of the day.
I have a headache today. I almost never have a headache. I want to relax but I can’t do it.
Oh.. I just realised I am going for hip hop tomorrow. That would be nice. I am looking forward to that. I have gone to two classes until now. We build on previous knowledge in every class. Some repetition and some new steps. I like the instructor in both ways 😉.
5 minutes of writing gave me much more relief than watching a TV series for 3 hours. I am feeling better. Let’s continue.
In some recent post I wrote about Hollow Knight. I was stuck at a stage where I needed an expensive key to unlock some gates in the game. Well, I worked hard in the game. I killed many insects in the town and collected enough money to buy the key from the seller. After all this, it turned out that the key doesn’t work with the gate that I wanted to open. That didn’t work out but then I roamed around in the town and found some areas that I had not visited. That’s good. That’s what the game is about. It’s all about exploring an unknown world. No one tells you the rules and features. You figure them out by playing the game.
I made spaghetti today. I know, sounds like nothing but it’s not. It’s something new I did today. I had a very big mushroom. I don’t know what it’s called. Maybe… No, I don’t remember the name. But it was a big mushroom. About 10 cms in diameter or less. I bought it for the first time so that was also new for today’s dinner. Then I had some more fancy mushrooms. I don’t know what they are called, but they were not typical white or similarly shaped brown mushrooms that we are used to see. I had cooked these mushrooms last week as well so they were not new for today’s dinner but still something I was trying for the second time. I added some bell pepper, and onion. I now realise that I forgot to add herbs. But anyway. I am learning new ways to cook. Last week I bought many veggies for the first time. I wanted to try new things. Oh, I also tried…what is it called…artichoke today. To be honest, I didn’t know how to eat it. I steamed it as a recipe website said but I did it a bit too much. I guess my artichokes were a little too dehydrated and old. There was barely any “meat” in them. I will try again. I will buy them again. As of now I don’t have enough information about them to reject them in future.
I printed a lof of photos some weeks ago but I still haven’t put them up on the walls. I have to buy some photo hanging stuff. Maybe clips or a tape or something. Now I recall that I didn’t do it until now because I am out of tape as well. I need to buy these things. I have been postponing them for the last two weekends.
Oh man. My slippers broke two days ago. Now I have to use my shoes as slippers until I buy new ones. I will try to do it tomorrow during lunch break. I will go to Decathlon. I might as well go to Hema. It’s right beside Decathlon.
Aah shit. I forgot to fix the gear of my bike. Okay, you need some context. I left my bike in the university this morning. All fine. When I came back in the afternoon, the front derailleur was messed up. It should be over the chain but it was twisted towards the wheel. It blocked the movement of the chain. Luckily I knew someone in my department who always keeps bike tools in the office. I fixed it temporarily in the uni and thought I will fix it properly once I get home. I forgot. Now it’s 22:43. I will do that tomorrow morning. It’s important. I will set a reminder.
My plants. Two of them (the same plants but in different pots) are not doing well. I don’t know what happened to them. Was it too much light or too less? Too much water or too less? Or are their leaves supposed to be like that? I don’t quite know. That plant doesn’t look happy. I have been negligent during the last three weeks. It is growing but I am not sure if it is happy. I will see how it changes during this week. One more plant is quite susceptible to light and water. I can see when it needs water but I haven’t yet figured out how much light it needs. There’s one plant that doesn’t care about anything. Doesn’t matter noticably if I give it water or not, or if I keep it in more or less light. It’s fine. One pot is the most beautiful of all. It has a pancake plant and one more. I don’t know its name. But that pot is the most healthy and beautiful. There are some more plants. They are doing fine. They are growing. They look happy to me. Oh and my coriander-rosemary-mint pot is also doing well. Now I just go out while cooking, pluck some from these plants, and use it in my dishes. They grow again. They are doing fine. I need some pots so that I can put the plants at different spots in my house. When I moved in, I had the vision to make it a jungle. Now I have some plants and they are doing well. They were little when I planted them. Now they have grown bigger and are ready to be moved on to a shelf. First I will buy some pots for them. Then I will buy some more plants. The plants I have now were donated to me by my colleagues. Now I have a little more feel for what kind of plants I want in my house. Now I can go to a shop in my neighbourhood to buy some more. I have been there once. It’s a huge plant store. I liked it. But first I need pots for the plants I have now.
Okay. That’s enough. Now I am sleepy. I will read Hendrik Groen for some time. Let’s see what that old bloke is doing.
Ciao!