I went to the gym today after almost three weeks. I was doing very well since the beginning of April until about three weeks ago. I was doing sports. I was sleeping properly. I was following a schedule. I was becoming more and more stable with time. I was taking good decisions. I was calm. I was under control. Then I went to an academic event three weeks ago on Monday and Tuesday. That lead to disturbed mind and increased workload on Wednesday and Thursday. That week go messed up. The next one too. And then the next week as well. And today is Monday. The last three weeks were a mess. I kind of went back on some of my decisions because I was not thinking properly. I made mistakes at work. I really ashamed myself at both places.

Fucking hell! Doing sports is important for me. I need it to stay sane. By sports I mean things I do on my own will. I had signed up for Hip hop and boxing but I did them in the last three weeks because I had to. It’s a course. They did not give me any mental satisfaction and relaxation I get by doing free sports like kickfit and gym. I was thinking about something else while dancing or boxing.

I am feeling so good today.

I think more rationally when I go for sports. I feel really good. I feel strong. I felt it until about three weeks ago. Today I am feeling it again.

Anyway, I am sleepy. Good night!

Tomorrow I will go for Spinning. Just an hour ago I was thinking that I would cancel the appointment because I want to plan my trip to Spain next week, but na na… not happening. I will go for Spinning. I would rather be tight on schedule but stable than have a lot of time and messed up.

I have never done spinning before. I am slightly concerned about my knee because it involves a lot of paddling. I will keep the resistance low to be safe but I will go for it tomorrow.

Okay…. bye bye…

Oh and today I had a thought about starting a podcast so that I can say things sometimes instead of writing. Just a thought….. I am happy with my blog. It was just a thought. I am happy with the freedom writing gives me. I like to write.

Okay… it’s getting late….

*yawns